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Be Kind, Be Healthy

10/27/2016

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Tools to Help Students Find Friends

10/25/2016

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Do you see students at your school sitting alone or having a hard time making friends?  For many students, navigating the schoolyard at break or finding a lunch buddy can be challenging and overwhelming.  Sitting by oneself is a lonely experience.  In some cases, students who are by themselves become targets for bullying. Feeling socially isolated can also cause poor academic performance.  What does your school do to encourage students to engage with others outside their groups or who may be feeling alone and ostracized?  We have a few ideas below to help your students find a welcoming place at school.

For older students, a new app called Sit With Us helps students who have difficulty finding a place to sit for lunch or hang out find a welcoming group.   The app allows students to designate themselves as “ambassadors,” thereby inviting others to join them. Ambassadors can then post “open lunch” events, which signal to anyone seeking company that they’re invited to join the ambassadors’ table.   Sit with Us is a mobile app that is designed to create a kinder more inclusive school community.  It was designed by 16-year Natalie Hampton after she experienced bullying and loneliness during her seventh-grade year.  Hampton told Audie Cornish on NPR’s “All Things Considered” that the reason why she felt an app like this was necessary is because it prevents kids from being publicly rejected and being considered social outcasts by their peers. She is definitely on to something - recent studies conducted by Princeton, Rutgers and Yale University show  that when students, especially the “cool kids,” stand up to bullying it has a significant impact. During a 2012-2013 school year, over 50 New Jersey middle schools provided their most socially competent students with social media tools and encouragement to combat bullying, and saw a reduction in student conflict reports by 30 percent.

We think Natalie's app is a great idea, especially for middle and high school students.  For those schools where phones aren't allowed or whose students are too young to bring them to school, here are a few other ideas to give kids a chance to feel included:

  • A Buddy Bench.  Designate a special bench on the playground where students can go if they are feeling lonely or need a friend. 
  • Schedule group activities during recess.  Rotate through with different games, dance parties, art projects. These low-key, fun, play times during school can help students gain important social skills and interact with kids they may not know well.
  • Ask teachers to celebrate their students unique talents and interests in class one day.  Our post last week had some great ideas on how teachers can run this project in class.
  • Middle and high schools can create an advisory group or peer mediation group, with a teacher to help facilitate, where students can come up with their own ideas on including others and solving problems. This group could also be a great student leadership team to run the 21 Day Kindness Challenge at your school!
  • Create a school garden (or planter beds) and invite everyone to get involved.  Watch your students grow and thrive alongside the plants!
  • Provide guidance and training for your yard duties to help them spot and support students who may be feeling lonely.
Share with us what your school is doing to help students develop friendships by sending us an email or posting a reply here!

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Teaching the Difference Between Tattling and Telling

10/18/2016

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Teaching children the difference between tattling and telling can help a child more than you realize. A child who tattles can often have a harder time making lasting connections with other children around them. Tattlers can be wearing on adults, too. It can be difficult to have patience for a child who is continuously seeking attention by tattling.

That being said, it is equally important for children to understand the difference between telling and tattling. Children who do not want to be identified as tattlers may not tell an adult about a situation when they should. This can be a detriment and can cause issues to arise later.

Here is a simple activity that you can do with your class, at the dinner table, even while driving in the car:

Step 1: Print out the Telling vs. Tattling poster.
Step 2: Starting with you - tell a story where a person is tattling or telling.
Step 3: Ask, “Am I tattling or telling?” You can have your students refer to the Telling vs. Tattling poster.  
Step 4: Ask the students to come up with their own stories and present them to the class. Encourage them to ask the question, “Am I tattling or telling?”

For ideas on stories you can check out these additional resources:
  • Bad Case of Tattle Tongue by Julia Cook - Book
  • I’m Telling a Tattlers Tale - Video 
  • Telling or Tattling Powerpoint Presentation by Mrs. Phillips 

Let us know what you are doing to help your children with understanding the difference between tattling and telling. Leave a comment or send us a message.
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How Can My School Pay for the 21 Day Kindness Challenge?

10/13/2016

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​We've designed our program to be extremely cost effective and budget friendly! The 21 Day Kindness Challenge School Program costs just about $1/student.  Our goal is to bring the 21 Day Kindness Challenge to as many schools that want it. Here are some different ways schools have paid for the program:

Student Involvement!
We believe that giving students the opportunity to raise money for the program provides them with invaluable leadership and career skills.  It can also be a bonding experience for students who may be having trouble fitting in or finding friends.  Some student leadership groups have raised money by hosting bake sales, rummage sales, runs/walks and other small fundraising activities.

Community Support!
Many school districts have special funds set aside for anti-bullying or wellness campaigns.  Check with your district office to see if this is an option for your school.

The 21 Day Kindness Challenge is also a great opportunity to reach out to local community organizations like your rotary club, 4-H, chamber of commerce, Lions Club, etc. for support.  Many groups are looking for ways to make an impact for their local students and will provide small grants to your school.

Parent Engagement!
Parent groups are also an excellent resource. You may want to reach out to your parent group (PTA, Home & School Club, Parent Alliance) to see if they will fund the 21 Day Kindness Challenge.  We have found that parents are very supportive of programs that will have a significant impact and that directly engage their children.

We are happy to help you!  Please contact us, and we would be delighted to provide you with specific funding ideas to meet your school's needs.  We have videos, flyers, email, and snail-mail templates, etc. that you can use for community groups and parents. 
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Our Book List for Building Friendships

10/11/2016

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Literature is a powerful way to teach life lessons! This month we have six book suggestions by grade level that focus on friendship. We hope you and your students enjoy these books. We’d love to hear any additional book recommendations you have, you can send us an email or add a comment below. ​

Elementary 

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The Name Jar by Yangsook Choi. The Name Jar is a story about a Korean immigrant. Unhei’s first few days at a new American school. This book gives you an opportunity to talk about culture differences, being kind, embracing differences, and being proud of who you are. Grade Level k-3
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Just Kidding by Trudy Ludwig. Just Kidding is a story about knowing the difference between teasing and hurting. The story illustrates how teasing can be hurtful and what a person can do if they find themselves in this situation. Grade 3-5
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Trouble Talk by Trudy Ludwig. Trouble Talk is a story about a young girl who gets caught up in gossip. Mayas’s friend Bailey can’t stop talking about everyone and everything. There are many discussions that can come out of this book, from how to deal with gossip to how a person can change their actions and ask for forgiveness. Grade Level 3-5

Middle School 

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School for Sidekicks by Kelly McCullough. School for Sidekicksis a story about how to navigate through life as a young boy. The undertones of the book are about loyalty, friendship, and hope for the future. This book was recently released in August! Grade Level 6-8
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Just as Long as We’re Together. Just as Long as We’re Together is a story about what it is like to be a young girl at thirteen. The main character, Stephanie, is going through several life changes from going to middle school to the biological changes a girl goes through at thirteen. Stephanie is trying to navigate through this thing called life. Grades 6-8

High School 

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The 6 Most Important Decisions You’ll Ever Make by Sean Covey. The 6 Most Important Decisions You’ll Ever Make helps teens with making informed decisions about school, friendships, parents and other major issues that teens face every day. Grades 9-12
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The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens: The Ultimate Teenage Success Guide. 
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens: The Ultimate Teenage Success Guide is a book that helps teens develop habits and connect with the things that matter to them. Please note it does discuss the topic of sex and drugs. Grade Level 8-12+
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How You Can Bring Students Together

10/6/2016

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​For many schools, finding ways to connect students from different groups on campus is a big challenge.  Kindness can help!

An act of kindness can be as easy as reaching out to get to know someone who is different from you  -- saying hello and getting to know one another.
The first step is finding just one thing you have in common! 

​Research suggests that humans have a deeply rooted feeling to be kind and generous, but some obstacles can keep us from acting on those basic impulses.  One of the biggest barriers to helping others is that of "group difference": we feel much less motivated to be kind or to help someone if they don’t seem to belong to our group —that is, if they’re not a member of our “in-group”—and we may even feel hostile toward members of an “out-group.”

The good news is that studies show that we can easily change who we consider to be part of our "in-group".  So a great way to encourage kindness and develop friendships is to identify things you have in common with another person - even if similarities don't seem very obvious at first.  For example, in one study, people were more likely to help a fallen jogger when the jogger was a fellow fan of the same soccer team than when the jogger was a fan of a rival team (as indicated by their shirt). But when participants were reminded of a shared identity with the fallen rival (being a soccer fan), they were more likely to help than they were to help a non-fan.

How can this information help you and your students at school? The exercise below from the Greater Good Science Center is designed to help expand students' sense of shared identity with others.  This works really when you have different groups on campus that don't always socialize or mingle together.  It will take just 15 minutes of your classroom time, but the impact for your school culture can be long lasting.  You may even want to encourage your students to do this exercise with a different person at least once per week.  

How It Works:
1. Think of a person in your life who seems to be very different from you in every way that you can imagine.  They might have different interests, different religious or political beliefs, or different life experiences.  They may even be someone with whom you have had a personal conflict, or who belongs to a group that has been in conflict with a group to which you belong.

2. Next, make a list of all of the things that you most likely share in common with this person. Perhaps you both go to the same school, have a class or two together, or live in the same neighborhood. Maybe you both have siblings or have parents who are divorced. Maybe you have had shared experiences, played a similar sport (or played some sport), seen the same movie, read the same book, shopped at the same grocery store.  At the broadest level, you both belong to the human species, which means that you share 99.9% of your DNA!

3. Review this list of commonalities. How do they make you see this person in a new light? Instead of simply seeing this person as someone unfamiliar to you, or as a member of an out-group, now try to see this person as an individual, one whose tastes and experiences might overlap with yours in certain ways.

4. Repeat this exercise whenever you meet someone who initially seems different from you, with whom you have a conflict, or who makes you feel uncomfortable. 
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We would love to hear from you if you try this exercise with your students!  Please reply to this post or on Facebook.  We believe that kindness and friendship can bring people closer together. Thank you to the Greater Good Science Center for this wonderful activity that works to achieve that goal.

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How you can help your child build new friendships at school.

10/4/2016

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Help your child build the confidence he or she needs to create new friendship connections at school. The beginning of school is a great time for parents to talk with their children about how to build new friendships. Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore, author of Smart Parenting for Smart Kids, discusses four ways you can help your child create new friendships. 

These four ways are outlined in the video:
  1. Seek out friendships with others who like doing the same kind of things you like doing.  
  2. Be friendly, smile, say hello or offer a compliment. 
  3. Do something nice for another person. 
  4. Make friends with a variety of people.
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    Note From the Founder

    Hello. I am the founder of the 21 Day Kindness Challenge Program.
    I believe if we focus our efforts on helping our young people develop good character values and teach them how to listen with their hearts their world will be a kinder place to live. It is my hope that my story inspires others to “be the change they want to see in the world.” 
            ~ Justina Bryant 

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  • About
    • Videos/News Articles
  • Packages & Pricing
    • Kindness eBook & eGuides
    • Classroom Edition
    • Elementary School
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  • Request Estimate
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